As covered in few of my previous posts also, Since last six
months I'm in Kualalumpur, Malaysia. Well not a continuous stay as I've been to
India three times in this period. But those breaks were for one week only.
Although it's a temporary deputation and my family and
permanent residence is still in India therefore I'm technically not an expat
but for all practical purpose we can consider me an expat. Hence the title of
the article.
I'm not going to harp about the so called cleanliness,
etiquettes or lack of traffic dust etc that you experience once staying outside
India. My article is more about the loneliness you feel when in a foreign
country. That feeling of being outside of your comfort zone. That sense of
unfamiliarity as your daily schedule that you are so used to changes totally.
The only external factor I'm going to talk (or rather write :) about) is the
problem in foods especially if you happen to be vegetarian like me.
I landed in Malaysia on 20th of February. In fact the reason
I remember this date so vividly is that it was only one day after I joined my
new company. Considering the notice period served after resigning in my
previous company, and the issue of passport renewal; visa application etc-etc .
It could be safely said that since the start of this year I was having a break
from my usual daily routine; the effect of which was even more amplified when I
landed in Kualalumpur.
One thing that Malaysian can really learn from us Indians is
how to stand in a Metro train. I witnessed this time and again as almost every
weekend I used to go to a place called Mini India wherein you can get good
north India food. The problem is sometimes the train can get really crowded
though not on the same level as in India on weekends.
In India people try to keep the door of the train free for
movement and themselves move to interior of train-coach. But here in Malaysia
this is not the case. Here it just does-not cross anybody mind to vacate the
door. Even the train coaches are quite different. In India the coaches are
designed so that there is more standing space to accommodate people than sets.
But here it's the other way round.
Anyway back to the main topic. Much has been said about our
comfort zone in so called Self-help books and the need to break the same but
mostly they cover the issue on Micro level. I feed there is the comfort zone on
Macro level. This sense of familiarity and security that you feed when you are
in your own country. I specifically used the word security here as I personally
experience this strange phenomena. Even though in India I'm staying in perhaps
the most unsafe area you can find across all the Big Metropolitan cities
(Delhi!!!). In Delhi NCR there is no surety of your safety even in your house.
And compared to that Malaysia is much more safer. Still I cannot get rid of
this nagging feeling of insecurity that I'm in a foreign country and hence
cannot do as I wish. The biggest contribution to the atmosphere of
unfamiliarity is the language.
Another problem of being an Indian in a foreign country is
that you have to live with a sense of shame. One because of having this
reputation of rape capital in the world.
And second because we don't hesitate from exhibition of
debauchery even when outside India. Infact we indulge even more so in such
behavior thinking that nobody knows us here. Not reflecting on the fact that
they do know us. They know us as Indians. No matter how much we rave about
other people being hypocrite in stereotyping all Indians in one mould. We
forget that this mould is made based on these small unconscious actions by us
only.
Other major and noticeable thing was when you realize that
you are without a root in such places. There is no history attached with the
surrounding. You cannot say that I was born here or at the place few hours of
road journey from here. You cannot claim to know the people living in various
parts of the country. You don't have any participation in the culture of this
place. You don't share the history of this place. The ups and downs witnessed
by this city in its journey since time immemorial.
You are just like a guest staying temporarily in a guest
house before moving to your destination eventually. The aspect where this difference
is most glaring is the politics. To me the this is the single most important
differentiator that tells if you really belong to a country or not. Getting
involved in politics shows if you really feel passion for the particular
country or not. It very easy to see that Indians residing here who by nature
are so much involved in politics (In India it should be declared as the
national pass-time) Become totally un-interested in Malaysian politics. It
really shows that in their heart they feel that they don't belong here.
Cont...
