Arranged Job v/s Love Job

I'm a self confessed book addict or book worm. Off-late I have been reading most of the books which can fall into a particular genre which is Marriage. It an amusing take of Millennials on the very concept of arranged marriage. Normally the plot is like this. The main protagonist in almost all the cases will be an independent working woman (Sexist thinking...) albeit very traditional and family oriented in her outlook. The family is shown as really orthodox in their thinking and gradually the protagonist will mold them. Overall tone of the books is fun and quirky. It has been light and easy read.
One of the noticeable things is the family pushing for arrange marriage and our protagonist rooting for love marriages. However as I was reading these books. It got me thinking into another direction altogether. As I'm already married (arranged marriage) more that 9 year back. Hence I cant really relate with this dilemma between love marriage and arranged marriage. But somehow the situations described in the books and dilemma looks very relatable to me in another aspect. Which is my job.
Even though I'm not a very professional minded person who puts his job above the personal life. Still the job plays a very important role in our life; for a very simple fact that roughly more than 50 percent of our day is spend in the Job. Though in my case the time spent in the job is around 70 percent. Unfortunately , whatever time is left in home is also mostly devoted in thinking about jobs (pending timelines, targets etc) only.
Not only that, What job we choose is the equally important decision as the life partner we choose. For the simple fact that over a period of time,  you job shaped your behavior, your personality among other things. As the selection of wrong life partner can makes your life a living hell. Similarly if you are stuck in wrong job with negativity all around and viciousness in the atmosphere, you will find yourself in a nightmare with no chances of coming out soon.
Even though it seems like that you can change your jobs with much more ease as compared to changing the life partner. However I can say with my personal experience to be not the case anymore. In a way as people keeps on stuck in an unhappy relationship with their life - partner for years, not able to summon enough courage for walking out. In the same manner, people are stuck with same kind of jobs for years not able to move out. And it not only about changing the job and landing up with another. Sometimes the solution is about doing on your own. Being a Entrepreneur. Our society seems to be much more liberal towards love-marriages than starting our own business. Your family, friends and relatives are still somewhat supportive or dont have any problem in case you want to choose your own life partner and even in arranged marriage nowadays people get to choose their own spouse at-least from a the available options.
But on the other end, if you come from service family in middle class. Then becoming a doctor or engineer is your only chance at salvation. And off course dont even dream of doing something ridiculous as staring your own venture. In their eyes, its a cardinal sin forsaking the security and doing something your love. Its very difficult

Personally I'm a very reserve and sober kind of person. The person who always feels awkward with large gathering of people, Not good at first impressions at all. So the template is pretty much set for me as I will fall into the most stereotypical of stereotypes. Arranged marriage off course, That too the girl will be selected by someone in the family and first girl that I'll see will be selected. Similarly on job front also its pretty straightforward, Like every good parent abiding son of society abiding parents, I will take Non-medical in school even if I used to like arts. The choice of taking engineering is also made even before I come of senses.
Obviously the journey has not been easy after that both in marriage and jobs especially as I could not crack the entrance examinations of prestigious few colleges in our country.But that's not the point. I could write much bigger blog posts explaining the struggles being faced by average engineering graduate. But you got to make best use of the cards you are dealt with.
Being unhappy in job or / and being unhappy in marriage place you in quandary. Especially if you are not able to get out of both (due to a variety of reasons). Sometime cheating seems like a very alluring proposition. As I'm still not able to muster courage / make a thorough plan for starting my own venture and off course due to some financial constraints, I have given some serious thoughts on pursuing the "Rocket Singh" model of it i.e. doing on my own while continuing employment.

In the nutshell, I'm pretty faithfully serving my marriage for the last 9 years and it seems like the turbulent period in our relationship is more or less already passed, But the same can't be said about my job prospects. I'm working from the last 13 years now (obviously I was working way before I got married), My struggle is still very much real and on. I'm getting bit comfortable financially. But creative satisfaction and sense of life is still pending. Or perhaps I'm wrong in the first place to look for the same in job in first place. Perhaps I should look for my passions outside the job. The question is, how do I find time for the same. And what is that elusive goal / target by the way ?



PS :
The sum total of your role in marriage and the job make what you are, if you ask him. And in this case sometime the sum of the parts is greater that the total. Unrealistic expectations from both creates dissatisfaction and the sense of longing.If you can find your passion and hobbies outside these two despite being faithful in your roles. Only then you can attain happiness.

Writer's Block

For a nation which in-spite of having tons of mythological anecdotes telling us different ways of attaining Nirvana. Surprisingly we find our way of life in myriad things like cricket and movies. More often than not, our philosophy, vision is driven by these only.

 One such line from cricket that I really believe in is that offense is the best defense. Hence I decide to take this writer's block head on or as they say in cricket analogy On front foot.
Sometimes back I decided to write my own book, I have been a vociferous reader for many years and obviously highly impressed by authors and their craft. It was quiet natural on my part to aspire to be an author.
But unfortunately almost as soon as I decided tho write a book that  I encountered writer's block. I even read a book on how to write a book and I'm writing a blog post on writer's block.
But these one liners are all I could come up with.

I also feel that a book is the work of your creation and it carries some part of yourself. It's your identity statement. Writer's Block is in the way a form of identity crisis only. You need to get sorted out in your mind about what you really are. The book will be your expression only then and atleast you will be clear about your genre and the idea you want to convey

The second crazy conclusion that I draw is that communication and imagination are indicator of your mental health. And stress, frustration are really detrimental for them. 

Hence for able to write you need to be in a peaceful state of mind  Although then how could great writers could come up with such classics and gems while living in adversity is beyond me. Perhaps writing is then a form of salvation for them. A mean to end this struggle. 

Sometimes I also feel is that I'm barking the wrong tree. I had setup myself to write a frictional work but perhaps I would have tried my hand in something non fictional. I also feel inclined to write short stories sometimes as writing a  full fledged story sometimes looks like too steep a hill to climb 

Last but not the least. I really feel paucity of time to pursue this passion. My current job is really stressful and leaves me stretching for time. I barely find time to finish the daily chores leaving practically no time for indulging in writing. Although how much of this is just an elaborate excuse I don't know. As I had this task of writing a book in my To Do list in my previous company too still I made nill progress inspite of having considerably more time on my hands 
Another aspect related to same point is that I've always been a slow starter in all aspects of my life. Not only I'm always relatively late to get on with my life (In fact I wonder if my problems are indicative of mid-life crisis or adolescence issue. Also by the same extension, for every activity I need more time than others. The same holds true for writing too. Very rarely it happens that I sit to write and the thoughts start coming to me immediately and in the flow. On the other hand most of the time, I'm staring at the blank screen for full 10-15 minutes before I could form any coherent thought. I have experienced the same while I was preparing for exams or I was studying too. I need to blankly stare at the book for some time before I could grasp anything. Probably my mind itself is a slow starting engine. The problem is all the more compounded due to scarcity of time for me. 

The good thing though is that I'm still able to keep up with the blogging and on track with the target of one blog per month. The secret is that I mostly write about my aims and experiences. Probably I should follow the same with my book. The problem is that than it will be a non fiction book which I dont think will be that interesting. Moreover I write on a variety of topics and hence these posts does not fulfill the basic requirement of linear , coherent narrative binding the full story. Though I do plan to use my personal experience in writing the book because thats what everybody does.

To sum it up, It seems like its not possible for me to have a well planned, well thought of story even before I start writing the first draft. Perhaps I should just select a protagonist (or more than one also. Create a background and let it go, It will have good and bad days based on my high and lows. Its belief will keep on changing based on my experience and shaped by my prejudices. Whether its story will be interesting in the end or not, I cant say.
But at-least it will be story close to real-life experiences. 

On another note, Of late I'm suffering from yet another anxiety issue mainly because of this social media stuff. I'm unable to form any firm opinion as I dont know whether the facts presented to me and based on which I'm forming my opinion are credible or not. Because in this age of Propaganda and Photoshop Miracles. The reality has become indeed very hard to find.

Goals appraisal - 2017!

"If Procrastination is a religion, I would be god"
I heard this line long time back (don't even remember who said it), But it stays with me as its true in more than one ways in my case. So much so that, I intended to do the goals - review after first quarter of the year. And the way thing are going, it seems that it will be half yearly review by the time I'm able to finish this.

As I try to sum-up the progress for the first few months of this year. One major trend was lack of progress for last few month. The graph or progress was great for Jan and Feb and then hit a major road-block in march and April.

Part of this reason can be attributed to the usual pattern that any new year resolutions follow, As the initial euphoric state subsides and the reality hit home. The progress graph plateau. Which surely happened in my case too. But the bigger reason was our inhuman workload since March causing us to work ungodly hours. In fact; the stress / workload / frustration of this job is now beginning to enervate me. But more on this later (in perhaps another blog past).

But still its the first half of the year only. There is still chance of pulling in back on track. Hence a review of the goals set in beginning of new year might give me the necessary impetus plus some insight on where I'm going wrong.

So, here are the goals plus their status for 2017!

PHYSICAL HEALTH
1) Reducing weight - target 70 - 72 kg from 76.5 kg.
Right now I stands at 74.5. I think from now onward things will get really tough as the inital flab is easier to loose. My schedule plus travelling is making it even tougher. As for learnings, Now I'm concentrating more on physical workout than dieting as there is a limit to how much you can starve. I've started Yoga and plan to start running in morning too.

2) Participate in Delhi half marathon
This is one target where I really needs to buckle up, The half marathon will be in November. Not even six months remaining and I'm yet to start running. This particular goals has been on my to - do list for many year now and I don't want to miss out on this yet again.
Immediate plan - starting running from Monday which is tomorrow

3) Weight training -
I tried to do bit of weight-lifting but still in really initial stages. Needs to really work on my stamina. Hopefully the Yoga and running (still to start) might help.

4) Yoga / Pranayam -
By coincidence I started Yoga. But then you need luck on your side sometimes too :). I pushed my wife to start Yoga and I"m learning from her meanwhile. But not so regular unfortunately which I plan to change.


MENTAL HEALTH

1) Blog - On it , right now too :)
Jokes apart. I had great beginning of this year in terms of number of blog post. The momentum is still helping me even though last few months were really dry. Still on track for at-least one blog post per year. But needs to be wary to slipping behind. One good thing is that now I'm never short of writing topics as I write on my experiments or experiences with new things.
Had five blog post now in this year in five months now.

2) Books
I'm a self confessed bookworm. Reading keeps in on track and away from depression. I've intentionally set very modest target of only 12-15 books for this year (Which I have already revised to 20 books). I have read around 8 books so far; so already ahead of schedule. The thing that I wanted to do differently this year is read more meaningful non fiction books rather than simple thrillers because those I can finish in one night itself. As someone very aptly has said that books are windows to the world. I need to include more variety in my reading lists. I also plan to write some sort of summary / review / my take away / new words added in my vocabulary from these books.

3) Writing my own book -
Here comes the road block. I have experienced writers block even before writing a single chapter of my book. In spite of setting a target of writing an initial draft of my book. All that I have managed to achieve is to read a book on how to write a book and perhaps short listed some topics. At this pace, writing a book is really a distant dream only.
Perhaps I need to track the progress on monthly basis and select the topic and brief outline of the story at the earliest (which is the basic requirement of writing a book)

4) Recreation -
The target selected under this heading was learning to play the guitar. Unfortunately I don't even have a guitar yet. I have been thinking of buying a guitar but perhaps it will be too late by then.
I will try to buy a guitar within next two months only

As if the above targets were not enough, I have added another target based on the circumstances from last few months. Which is to change my job. Based on my last experience. This target itself is so big that it dwarf all other targets. And moreover it consumes lots of time and energy too.
I plan to change this job max by the end of this year.

In the nutshell. All that I need to do now is to exercise daily and try to write something (However inconsequential that may be ) daily so that I have enough writing practice. Hopefully then by next month I will enough writing practice to start draft of my first book. Side by side finding time for buying time to buy guitar and running each morning.

I'm sure its going to be as difficult if not more as it sound !

My experiment with outdoor camping

Being one with the nature was something that I always craved since my childhood. In the hindsight, I was lucky to spend majority of my growing up years in different parts of the country which were diverse in geography but having one common pattern in the sense that all these places were more closer to natural jungle than concrete jungles.
In any case I'm not a very extrovert kind of person , therefore I always find myself more at home in secluded, calm places than let's say in crowded malls etc. I'm always game for any sort of adventure activity especially if it involves being closer to nature. I've done river rafting, trekking, para-gliding, lots of annual vacation at hill-stations. But now I wanted to take this to next level. One of crazy idea in my bucket list is to experience outdoor camping away from the hustle - bustle of the city. Actually inception of this idea was originally in my close friend's mind but like most of my goals, hobbies. I borrowed and made it my own.
For quite some time, Camping on our own has been a topic which we frequently discuss, mull over, make some crazy plans which never fructify, decide in all seriousness that we will definitely try it next week. It sort of developed a pattern which we somehow were not able to break; till last month.
This time too it started as it always do. While chatting on skype, My friend quipped that we must plan for an outdoor camping experience. Since it was starting of new year. I was all pumped up with the excitement and motivation that you feel for a few weeks after making your new year resolution. Plus as the luck would have it. I have to attend some family functions spaced over a week with some 2-3 days free in between. As I would be in my hometown during this duration with nothing else to do and keen to get away from my ever-inquisitive relatives. I find it a golden opportunity to satisfy my long standing whim. And thus begin my first experience with outdoor camping.
The family functions in question here was wedding of two of the cousin's from my wife's side. And as I said earlier, they were spaced round the week. So I landed up in Chandigarh with the family and duly attended the first set of functions. Though we have talked about the preparations for this camping trip but unfortunately we could not take out time for this. Hence it was more like in the spur of the moment kind of trip plus there was still some ambiguity about the real dates as I was not sure when I could get away from all this madness. But fortunately everything went alright and I ultimately landed up at my friends place to start this camping experiment. The situation was one down, one to go. As I was free from my last moment urgency; But my friend was still in his office and hence very much occupied. Anyways after some time both of us as relieved of urgent pending to do task and ready for this adventure of outdoor camping.
So we get into the car, took some bare essentials for this trip and decided to head towards Morni hills which is a secluded yet famous weekend getaway near Chandigarh, especially for college going crowd. To reach this spot, you actually has to pass through natural forest. The distance is not too much. Plus there is a guesthouse operated by Himachal tourism right at the bank of lake after the Morni hills, called Tikkartaal. In fact during one of my previous visits to this place, I had spotted some tents just beside this guesthouse which I understand were operated by the tourism department itself. We were also open to the idea of renting out their tents itself. The way to this lake was itself picturesque perhaps moreso because of the calm and tranquil state of mind that we were in. We stopped at the local grocery shop in a village on the way and bought some Knicks knacks, snacks plus matchbox as we were in full on mood of outdoor camping with bonfire. We made two more stops in the way; One for collecting some dried up branches of tress (We were lucky to find heap of wood, preferably collected by some nearby villager) and for having a plate of maggie. Yes we actually find one person selling noodles and other snacks very close to our destination. As we were in no hurry whatsoever and were feeling a bit hungry too. We stopped at that place. The food-stall owner actually has built a nice place for bonfire. Overall it has nice ambiance and the maggie was not bad too. After treating our taste - buds. We went ahead with our trip.
And so we reached our destination. It was twilight and the lake nested inside the mountains was looking even more beautiful. Coupled with that village like ambience with some folks songs sounding on radios, smoke rising from homes signaling the preparations of foods. Few snap of this picturesque setting below.

 Everything was perfect but for one thing, there were no tents there. Even though we had carried makeshift tent in our car, still it was a big setback for us. Anyways we were not going to abandon our program due to this reason only. So we decided to follow our initial plan of enjoying the idleness even without the tents. So we sat down on the ground just near the parked car. The place was the best combination you can get between total wilderness yet accessible and secure. Although on secure part I will cover later on.
We chit chats for some time, talking about all the irrelevant topics. The sun was setting on the horizon. We could see the shadow of the same on the surface of the lake. After a while the stars come out. The sight of star-studded sky is something that you don't get to see in our over populated city. Once the darkness descends, it was almost impossible to judge if we were sitting in a city or a totally remote area. Just like the stars above, this total darkness is again something we are not accustomed to. After a while, I could see the shadows lengthening which was driving my over creative mind into overdrive. After some time, we decided to satisfy our whim by making the bonfire. In any case darkness coupled with dogs barking (I have a long-standing phobia against dogs) was unnerving us. We took out all the dry figs collected by us and got to the task to making the bonfire. Even though we had shown the presence of mind to buy matches from the grocery shop on the way. Still, lighting the bonfire was not as easy as it sounds. Unfortunately we did not have kerosene or anything else. All that we had was some old newspapers lying the car which we promptly wrapped on the wooden sticks and try to make the fire. It does not seems like we were going to make the Bonfire till my friend come up with a indigenous innovation better known as Jugaad. He found out that polythene film wrapped on the wooden fig makes it catch fire really easily. Probably because polythene is in essence oil and it should catch fire. Anyways it was a good hack. As to the question of where to find the polythene. Well unfortunately full of India is a big dustbin. You can easily find empty water bottles and chips / snacks packets scattered more-so at so called ecologically sensitive areas. For us it was actually hitting two birds with one stone. As not only we were enjoying outdoor camping, but also helping in cleaning the environment a bit. We actually made a good Bonfire, pic below.

The problem however was that we never had enough wood to last the night. So after a few hours maximum the fire was done and we were left with some simmering amber as the last remnant of our adventure. The forest nearby start appearing more scary since our eyes were not yet adjusted to the absence of light. I could sense the hair on my arm standing due to the sound of some dogs barking nearby. Good that we had one long stick which gives us some sense of protection. However false that may be. We fooled around for some more time but then ultimately could not shy away from the big question. Should we erect the tent lying in the car. After some deliberation also considering the fact that we don't have anything to defend ourselves. We decided not to pitch the tent. Another major factor was that it was really chilly outside and we were not prepared for that either. Hence we decided to use the car as makeshift tent for the night. I agree it was a major dampener and not at all a substitute for what we have originally come for. But it was a best bet we have considering the circumstances. Anyways we were as uncomfortable as we would be in a car parked in a totally secluded and forest area. My friend obviously is used to such adventures and was quite comfortably asleep in new minutes But I was almost fully awake for the whole duration.

At around 4 in the morning I think, Our body started reminding us we did not had anything for dinner last night (Save for some snacks) and the sleepless night did nothing to assuage the hunger rather it increased it. Hence we said enough is enough and with that our first experiment was finished. Nonetheless we still had some fun which includes night drives in foothills around Chandigarh; looking for some road side dhaba which would be open at such ungodly time and having steaming hot parantha's early in the morning.

So with this we concluded our first experiment of outdoor camping.

PS : At more than 1600 words, This is the longest blog post I have ever written

My experiment with GM diet - 1

One of the goal in new year resolutions (and in past few years) has been to reduce weight.
For the past few years. The one area which has been seeing constant growth is the area around my waistline. Very conveniently I have been mistaking this FAT for bulking up or muscle unless I got a rude awakening in the form of lower back pain. In fact, one fine day the situation worsened so much that I have been unable to get up from the bed. I had to take some medical assistance. But it was like warning bell for me to better take care of my weight. Since then, reducing weight has always been on my agenda. But I'm never able to make much headway about it. That was till last year.
Then one really interesting thing happened to me. I changed jobs (again tick off one of major to do point) and was deputed to Malaysia for period of 6-7 months. My total experience in Malaysia was topic for another day.But one of the unique thing about my situation there was a shortage of good North-Indian foods. As a by-product of this I was able to reduce my weight. I managed to shed off around 5 kg from my waistline.
The problem however was that it returned with a vengeance on my return back to India. Since I feasted on all the delicacies I could lay my hands upon. Moreover now I was limited to sitting all day in front of laptop coupled with driving in car 3-4 hours daily.
But then I was really determined to reach the wait level of Malaysia and even to excel that. Hence one of the goal in my New year resolution was to reduce weight. The problem with such kind of goals is that it really take sustained and continuous efforts over a longer period of time with little or almost negligible results to show off. And if by any means you managed to give in to the your cravings for desserts or snacks. Then all the efforts go down the drain. That's why I become really interested in GM diet or General Motors Diet.
It offer almost everything (instant weight loss, cleansing of system, skin glow) just stopping short of Nirvana.
So I geared up to take this challenge right in the first month of New year itself. The basic premise of GM diet is very simple. It cut down on the carbohydrates (so no chapati or rice). Also every day is fixed for fruits or vegetables (that too boiled or raw only). It claims to reduce around 5-7 kg in a single week.
The brief synopsis of 7 day is as below
Day 1 : All fruit day except banana, grapes, litchi and mangoes
Day 2 : All vegetable day (not fried, but boiled or raw)
Day 3 : The combination fruit and vegetables
Day 4 :  Full day banana and milk only (for sodium and potassium)
Day 5 :  This day is for Tomato, sprouts and cottage cheese with some soya chunks thrown in
Day 6 :  Same as day 5, the only change being that tomatoes are replaced with soup
Day 7 : The last day is for fresh fruit juice, one cup of brown rice / single chapati and some vegetables
The more details about GM diet can be found on link below -
http://www.thefitindian.com/the-fastest-indian-vegetarian-diet-to-lose-weight/

At-last the elusive day comes and I was all charged up for the experience. I planned to start this on Monday as it was seven day plan and what better day to start this than the first day of the week. The added advantage of it being the working day is that I will be busy in work with no distractions. So I stocked up all the fruits one day before on Sunday which is also the day for our weekly fruit and grain market. The only flip side was that there was no Melons available in this season which is highly recommended due to high water content. I was more worried about day 2 that how I will pass the full day with boiled, raw vegetables only which I'm not used to eating. Little did I know that I cant even pass Day 1 successfully.
The complete day meal-plan was divided into six mini meals. So I need to eat six servings of fruits only. As I get up early and have breakfast at 7 itself so six meal servings was not a problem. So I started with and apple and packed some fruits also for lunch and other mid day snacks.
Incidentally my office starts at 8.30 and I need to leave at 7 from my home.Hence I have breakfast pretty early. By the time I reach office already one and half hours has elapsed since I had my fruit breakfast and I was already feeling a bit hungry. At around 10am I had one guava plus some (in fact lots of) water. Everything seems to go well up-till that point. In lunch I had papaya (I'm normally not very fond of it. but since it was all fruits day I don't have much options. I think at around 3pm the things started to go wrong a bit. I was having a mild headache all day but now it started to get worse. In the hindsight perhaps not having tea or coffee the whole day was my undoing as I started experiencing what you can call cold turkey for tea / coffee. Perhaps I took the GM diet schedule too strictly which way no tea or coffee with milk. The diet recommends black  tea / coffee but the same was not available. I think I took green tea and then thought about having an orange. I have eaten just one slice of it but then did not liked it one bit. It was around 4.30 and only one hour left in office time so I thought about having some rest.
But my condition was worsening every moment. I could not even take any medication as practically my stomach was empty and it was not recommended to take any medicines. For the worse I was feeling a bit nauseated also.
Just before the closing time of office, I vomited in rest-room. The immediate problem was that I still need to drive for around 2.5 hours before I could reach home. Fortunately I carpool with me colleague and hence the duty of driving me home was on him. The long drive back home was even longer for me. I somehow control it all the way but vomited just outside my home. I had some homemade khichdi before going off to sleep.
That was the end of my experiment with GM Diet. I could not even complete first day which was supposedly easier of the lot. For next time I need to take care of few thing that I learnt in this experiment. Firstly maybe doing this on first day of week is not a good time. Perhaps its better to start this experiment on weekend. This way I will be better prepared for emergency as I will be at home only. Almost if I could reach monday then I will have headstart of two days as already two days with diet has already elapsed. The second thing I will not cut on the tea or coffee while following this diet plan. I think it will be too much implementing both the thing (cutting on cereals as well as tea) at the same time.
Even though the experiment was tough still I'm not giving it up yet. Will surely give one more try.
The last thing is regarding the results. Even though it does not really count as I had to give up on GM diet only after one day. Still the reading on weighing scale shows weigh-loss of 1.3 kg. Perhaps the major contribution in that was of vomiting. I'm all in for such one day session if I could lose around 1 kg in one day. Jokes apart. I think this is more of replacing your foods with healthy options that diet.
So I don't think there are any adverse effects to following this diet plan. Definitely worth a second try.

Goals / Passion 2017

As covered in my earlier post too..
This year I'm not going to set Goals. As I have tried setting Goals for past few years. I could achieve some of them. But never found enough motivation to achieve all or majority of them. So I'm going to hit the nail on its head and set my goal as the same thing which is lacking all those years.
PASSION
The issue however is that I'm not a passionate person at all by nature. I have always been a very aloof person. I could not any passion work pursuing at all. So as a great speaker has said (in Tedex) "Fake it till you become it". I'm going to create my passions for me. In fact on second thoughts, this does not seems so absurd a notion. I think the goals that I keep on setting year and year and somehow reflection of my passion only. Its just that I'm so trapped in the rat-race that these passions are buried somewhere deep inside.

So without much ado (Since I don't want to spend whole of 2017 in planing to plan only). Here are my goals aka Passions.

Physical Health

• Reducing weight, target range 70 - 72 : My current wt stands at 76.5 kg. So that around 5-7 kg weight loss or roughly 10% reduction.
• Participate in Delhi half marathon : Brisk walking / running is one of the fitness activity I can indulge in more often as per my convenience. But my ultimate goal is to participate in half marathon. And I live in Delhi so Delhi half marathon is the best bet for me. Another convenient thing is that its normally scheduled in end of year making it best suited for new year resolution.
• Weight training : I would really like to bulk up specially in arms. Hence I plan to follow weight training also Even though following this along with weight reduction is tough.
• Yoga / Paranayam : For past many years. I'm constantly trying to follow my fitness related goals. Unfortunately there are not much results to show off. The only positives are that I have managed to stop my weight and waistline from deteriorating and almost eliminated my back pain issues. The negative on the other side is that it has been all about physical fitness, abs, muscle. Leaving the other aspects behind. Even though I believe and sometimes practices meditation and have done bit of Yoga in school. Still this area is more of less neglected one. This year I plan to follow Yoga regularly.

Mental Health

• Blogs : Well that what I'm doing right now. I plan to keep up with blogging and improve it further both qualitatively and quantitatively. Target is 12-15 post.
• Books : I love reading books, Hence its one of the goals I achieve very easily. However this year I will go for quality instead of quantity only. One of my target is classics provided they are easy to read. Target is 12-15 boooks
• Writing my own book : Yes I still nurture this madness in-spite of having encountered writers block many times last year. How and when I'm going to do this; I don't know. But I plan to at-least write first draft for my book this year.
• Recreation : I wanted to be able to play one musical instrument and my choice is Guitar. I have an on and off try on this earlier but could not go very far. You would find this in my new years list. This year I can get it off the block (Hopefully)

Goals 2016 appraisal

New year is the time for resolutions, but it is also the time for looking back at the goals for last year. Perhaps analyzing last year goals is even more important than making goals / resolutions for this year. So I'm going to analyse the last year's goals and track the progress against each goal too.
Also if I can draw some lessons out of the status (passed / failed) of each goals. So the list of my last year goals are as below.

1) Books - 15 books
Now this is really interesting. Because last year I end up reading 50 books. Yes that correct, I read 50 books last year. How it leads up to that is also pretty interesting. If I remember correctly I ready around 20-25 books in 2015. Then I was commuting by metro to my office and has plenty of free time to read books. As it happened; I changed job at end of 2015. Now I have to drive daily to my office plus very little free time is available. So I though to reduce my goal.
But I have to attend few months training in Malaysia where has lot to free time as there was no family / friends to spend time with. Hence I spend most of my time in reading books. That I could have utilized this time in complete other neglected goals in another story though.

In fact I read so many books that now I'm displaying withdrawal symptoms plus now my inclination is more toward quality read too.

PS : I took subscription of Kindly unlimited last year wherein I can read unlimited books but was really disappointed with the quality of books. Not going to repeat this mistake now. As for free books. Well I have bookbub.

2) Blog - 12 posts (full articles)
Well another goals, Where I still have some progress. I completed 9 blog posts compared to target of 12. There also I could see a pattern. No post in staring of year due to new job complication. Then pretty much on track for one post a month. But in the end of year again can't keep up due to adjustment with hectic travelling once I was back in India.
The good thing is that I stayed true to my resolution of writing full post only. Not some random quote just to make up the number
Though i still wants to write more and longer.
PS : I also tried to write to book but failed spectacularly [writers block!]

3) Physical fitness - Delhi half marathon, swimming
I could not partcipate or even prepare for Delhi half marathon. So a big failure there. But swimming I still could achieve somewhat as my my apartment in Malaysia has indoor pool. I tried satisfactorily there as lean backstroke and tried my hands at other strokes too.
PS : The big elephant in the room here is reducing weight. My target was to reduce from 78 to 75. I even reached 72.2 when I was in Malaysia due to food issues. But weight gain was back with a bang once back in India. At end of last year; my weight was 75.7. So still did satisfactory I would think. My overall fitness leaves a lot to be desired though

4) Communication - Toastmasters (one stage)
Big zero is this regard. I can consol myself by saying that reading books and blogging (my top two goals) are also related to communication. But the main aims herein was either to write a book or give speeches at Toastmaster.Both of which I could not achieve.

5) Qualification - Corres. degree (optional - MBA)
No progress at all

6) Financial - Planning, Equity
No progress at all

7) Recreation - Learn one new hobby (Guitar)
No progress at all. Perhaps one of my biggest disappointment. Missing out on such goals indicates that you are really getting mechanical. It has been on my to-do list for years but still not able to make any headway with it.

8) Technical - Learn one new software (Solid works)
No progress at all. Looking to replace this software with another one (ABB robo studio) but the problem is that I don't have the license key for the same

9) Entrepreneurship - Prepare business plan with road-map
No progress at all. In this particular case I' like a deer in Headlight. Have absolutely no idea how to move further in this goal. Desperately lagging behind and but I now seriously doubt if I really has it in me to be a Entrepreneur at all!

Well it does not look promising at all. 3 out of 9. In-fact its quite a revelation for me. Before actually doing this exercise, I was pretty sure that I did alright last year. Looking back at last year. I could relate with so many things I did last year. So many achievements!!. The only problem being that the achievement were not in line with my goals at all. 
That the main essence of Rat-race. Just doing so many things give you a sense of accomplishment. Wherein the main thing 
Are you goals aligned with the main Aim.

Also perhaps some of my goals were not so important for me so ignite the fire within. 
For this year, I'm going to set goals that are synonymous with passion.
My goals will be few (perhaps I'm going to divide my goals into primary and secondary goals.

So I need to answer an even more difficult question that what are your goals.
The question is. what are the things I'm really passionate about.

PS : 3 out of 9 makes it 33.3 % which is the infamous pass percentage in our schools. Perhaps the analogy is befitting in my case too. I can say I just about get passed in this exam But I need to pull my socks for next session (2017) which is already started

Blank slate - Again!

So we have that day again!
That day when you can feel the positivity in the air. When almost everyone is happy and motivated. Well almost everyone. Except for some people who are perpetually in pessimistic state.
The day for planning with renewed vigor.
The day when we shed the baggage of procrastination, frustration, negativity and pursue the journey ahead with zeal.
Its the first day of new year!
Normally people take stock of their plans for last year, make resolutions for new year regarding whatever they wanted to achieve in coming year.
I think before all that, better to soak in all the positivity, be grateful that we have got a blank slate again so that we can start afresh.
Its a chance to let go of everything that was bogging us down.

Another thing to keep in mind is that this new beginning is not limited to 1st of January only. The pattern that I have observed is our mood swings are like see-saw or sinusoidal waveform. Hyperactive on start of new year but deflated like balloon out of air on the sign of first hurdle or setback which sometimes can happen as soon as the first day only.
I  think it happens with everyone and I'm no exception,  but whenever it  happens to me I'll keep in mind two things

1)  This new year  is like a  blank  diary of 365  pages.  If  first page is torn or  soiled that it  does not means that you cannot create something good on  remaining pages

2)  Its imperative to set positive goals not the negative  ones,  This  positive or negative I  does not mean positive and negative in moral sense. for me negative goals are with magic word "No", "Zero" or "Without". The problem with such goals lies in old adage that says "Not thinking about something is also thinking about same thing only". 

One of the main endeavor is my life has been is to get out of this rat - race. But unfortunately to get out of the rat-race also, You have to run faster. And new year is the time when the whistle goes off.So this time is like
Get. Set , Go!