How to be assertive. First a disclaimer, the post title is incredibly cheesy and clichéd. I will be very disappointed if this is final extent what I could think of creatively. However since I'm trying to be back on track after a long hiatus in blogging, I would focus more on the post right now than fretting about the title. (Plus going with latest trends. there is always AI to lend you a helping hand :) )
So why I'm venturing into this rabbit hole now. Because at different stages of your personal and professional journey, your focus area shifts as it should be. Sometimes you are trying to reinforce your relative strengths, to leverage them for better growth. And other times you try to work on your relative weaknesses as your find them dragging you down. In last few year ;my professional growth has been really good and it rubs off on your personal aspects as well as subconsciously you find subtle changes in your personality while handling bigger and bigger responsibilities. I have decent communication and technical skills (humblebrag alert !). Strangely contrary to conventional wisdom (which says you need to focus on communication and motivational skills when at senior leadership level), My major focus was on hard, technical skills only. I acquired certifications in Project Management and Functional Safety and recently was looking in area of Artificial Intelligence. My current role gave my liberty to focus on any area that I wish (as the company is evolving) and I choose to see myself as a CTO.
But that is changing now, I'm beginning to focus more on Business development aspect (as we are seriously lagging behind in sales). And at the very top level, everything is about numbers. So there is pressure to deliver. Another factor which accentuates the situation is that I'm working in this company for more than five and half years now, And in the Indian team, I'm the oldest as well as the senior most members. So I have to carry the baggage of all failures, lost initiative, missteps by previous management. Based on my previous experience, When the organization is under-delivering on the whole. The owner starts looking for "superstar". The prospective candidates who promise the moons and stars and everything in between, More often than not, these people are smooth talkers and sly as fox. So unless you can communicate assertively, There is no saving you from decline on slippery slope from where there is no coming back.
So here I am, getting increasingly less and less chance to speak and participate in core leadership group. And whenever I do get a chance to speak, its like walking on eggshells. Anything that I say seems to trigger the top boss (who is incidentally the owner of the company as well). Its not doing my confidence a world of good and I have no option but to be walk the fine line between assertiveness and aggressiveness. As becoming a passive spectator and letting things take their own course is not an option.
I'm an introvert person by nature so blessed (or cursed) with trait that I'm a better listener than speaker. The group interactions, where all other senior manager jostled for attention of top boss, are not my favorite events. My natural cadence or pace of speech delivery is also on the slower side (based on feedback received from multiple people.
The exact situation and struggles before my company; is a subject that merit another post as it will be too technical and specific to international business and packaging automation. So I steer off from that topic for now. This post is more on the communication part.
So to form the vague outline of plan, I divide the communication into two parts, Tone and the content. As I need to work on both the aspects. I believe I need to add a third element of context here as well.
First the third one, broadly I speak on three type of occasions. Explaining something to customers or giving presentation, the kind of occasions that I enjoy. As I wear the technical hat (not sales or commercial). More often that not; customer is keen to hear what I want to say. So I have no problem in communicating even though I encounter a whole spectrum of customer and it a good challenge to vary your message depending upon the occasion.
The second type of occasion is meeting within India team. Here also I have smooth sailing mainly because I'm senior most person (that is about to change very soon..) and us being a very hierarchical society; other team members does not oppose my views openly. In fact these kind of occasions are easier for me to practice assertive communication skills.
The third is the most challenging and difficult one, My interaction with core group which is senior leadership group that takes most decision. And it includes owner of the company as well who has headstrong personality and dominates most of the discussion in the group. This is the platform where I have to be at my assertive best.
Now coming back to other two aspects, tone and content. First is about content. The major part of it is about the homework and preparedness. When interacting with top boss, you are supposed to be on top of all things and have every information on your fingertips. The owner would love to catch you off guard. So he will change the pre-set agenda and ask some vague information that is not relevant and not expected. More often than not, it tests your confidence and on the spot thinking. If you fumbles for information at that instant, you are gone.
Regarding the tone, I have a very monotonous tone by nature. I had enrolled into Toastmasters (https://toastmasters.org/) more than 10 years back which is like a club focused on public speaking. I manage to complete the first stage of certification (which includes 10 speeches). The feedback was very consistent on few aspects. One that I have a serious expressionless face while delivering the speeches and I looks very stressed. And Second my natural voice tone is very flat. Not much modulations so I come across as very emotionless (Not sure if its a bad thing in high level business interactions though)
As I still don't have a action plan other than having more conviction in my ideas and show more confidence (which is easier said than done). I don't have anything to add on that front and should conclude my post here.
PS : I tried to look online for any solution and did not find anything great apart from some generic advise.
