My reading glasses Evolution Cradle

I took a book for reading after a good gap of more than two months which is pretty unusual for me actually. As I was not able to built a tempo for reading. I took an easy gratitious pick. A combinaton of thriller and mythfiction. So how it goes. Lets see.

One of the first thing I noticed even before staring the book was that this is a new author for me. I have a tendency to compare all these authors with Dan Brown as that was my first brush with this genre. Subsequently I ready Ashwin Sanghi a few others but never quite had the same kick. Personally I find that Dan Brown has more tension in the plan typical of a thriller while enfusing the book wtih tid bits of history and religion. Whereas Ashwin Sanghi and others (including this author too) does not have same tension in the plot plus they have more mythology than history which does not tie as well.

The main protagonist Chad who is a scientist trying to create a cross species with his team of three more scientists. After a chance discovery leds them to a breakthrough. They were referred to another scientists related with Hitler himself who also tells them about a secret and sinister society with plan for world dominance (Vril Society). I would not spoil the plot by going into more details. But the scientist duo embark on an adventure across India

So as per me, what works for the plot. 

There is a nice colloqial quality to the plot and story keeps on flowing nicely. There is understated humour in conversation without overdoing it which I appreciates. It was a nice spin on Indian mythology that the authors linked mythological characters as half human half animals cross species experiments. The multiple and parallel narratives in the story are also well handled compared to some of the other books that I have read. As for the main twist in the end, the author do tried to throw some breadcrumbs foreshadowing it.

But somehow I have more complaints than praises for this book and a bit of disappointment as this genre is close to my heart and I feel that its a golden oppotrunity squandered by the writer.

So what does not work for me in the plot.

First I firmly belive that there should be some basis for flight of fantasy. Its always good to include some sort of disclaimer in the book and list the body of references in the end for further reading if ther reader is more interested. I found that sorely missing. 

The first chapter itself included some wild theory to form basis of Cow worship in hindues. The theory propogated is that "cow was probably the first complex multicellular organism after the Ice Age. So, basically, the dinosaurs disappeared but the cow magically appeared right after that. Cow never followed the basic principles of evolution like we humans did. It was as if it just appeared out of nowhere." Without any scientific literatur to backup it up. I found it as a cheap shot to appeal to a certian audience. 

Secondly I feel there are too many concepts forcibly squeezed into a single book. such as 

"Kauravas in Mahabharata as an example of embryo splitting and cloning "

"Reverse Aryan Migration"

"Divine weapons from Mahabharata"

"Ajanta and Ellora Caves made by gods"

"Nuclear weapons used in Mahabharata"

"Yetis in himalaya"

"Hidden city of Sangri-la"

"Zoroastrian religion practiced in Afganistan"

If only author would have let go of the temptation to include everything in the same story. It would have been more coherent and compelling read.

Also I was expecting that Author would touch upon a bit on the moral and ethical dilemma involved when men tried to be God or interfere in natural order.

There were four scientists in the team but Fourth member is not mentioned at all once the story took place. Even in the end She was not mentioned,  forgotten?

Its funny how less we know about our ancient civilization apart from some made up claims to boost our ego. 

PS : Not only I took to book reading after big gap. I'm writing a book review after an even bigger gap. I had this problem of immediately jumping to my next book after one read leaving very little time to get my thoughts in order and write a review of the book.

Sales and Entrepreneurship

24 December 2020

I’ll start the post with a useless trivia first as off late I'm fascinated by these useless tidbits of information. The information is that I'm writing the post in the morning on my mobile one day before Christmas. This is important for me as I have been struggling to post blogs for quite some time now and is under extended writer's block currently. Hence this small effort to break the shackles.

Okay now to the main topic, Sales and Entrepreneurship. I'm neither in Sales nor an entrepreneur right now. So why do I want to write on this topic. My current profile can be termed as product management or application engineering or Sales engineering or Proposals or technical sales. The very fact that we have so many names for the role makes it amply clear that my job can be viewed at many different angles. To separate wheat from the chaff. I'll like to define it as a crossroad, from where one road leads to Sales and second to Machine designing. I have been always more inclined to Sales than design due to various reasons. And this job is giving me opportunity to transition into Sales gradually (at least for now). Entrepreneurship on the other hand is always a long-term solution or dream for me. Hence this post.

 

To give some insight into my current company, it started only in this infamous year of COVID 19. Is an Indian arm of newly formed group. Hence, we have very limited visibility among the target customers. We have a very lean team hence not many people in Sales right now. As part of application team, I am present in all customer meeting, attest for serious customers. In other words, the situation cannot be riper for my transition into Sales.

I'm trying to remain focused and don't try too many things at once as its always a good thing to start with basics and built a solid foundation 

Firstly. I'm mentally preparing myself to be ready to front customer and give our company's presentation at short notice (I already had an experience where I was asked to present about the company at last moment and I struggled). Obviously like everything else,  its getting better with more practice. 

Secondly, I’m reaching into my network to collect relevant information about prospective customers.

Thirdly, I’m working on improving company's corporate presentation (which I target to finish in this year). 

Fourth, I’m going to write my elevator pitch which I'd like to keep a bit longer. 

Fifth I'm going to listen to all the company's presentation for my company on YouTube etc, I understand there are not many of them plus even less in English, Hence I will look at our competitor’s presentation as well to understand how they present their company 

 

I could have done on and on and one. But I know that execution is my weak point compared to planning. Hence, I'll stop here and focus more on how to implement the steps listed above.

Now coming to the second parts. Enterpreneurship. All the points listed above on sales are relevant for an Enterpreneur too. As broadly its always better to have Sales related orientation for running any business. But its not only about sales. There are various other factors too like risk taking, reach out to team. Leading not only your peer group and sometimes your superiores as well. Building your personal brand with prospective customers and network. Gathering business intelligence. Working more on presentation. And last but not the least, self discipline and will power to finish the task even if its monotonous or something that you didn't enjoy. It starts with setting small small targets and putting max effort in achieving them 

As my current company is in a start up phase, I'm gaining the experience of various challenges involved in setting up a company.

Also I'm trying to gain some insight into the financial matters as well for which U have no prior experience.

In the nutshell, I need to have visibility about all aspects if business If I wish to fulfill my dream of entrepreneurship. I have started my journey with baby steps in that direction.

 

Birthday - A day to reflect

20 October 2020

When I started this blog good six years ago. The occasions like Birthday, New year etc were my favourite topics since it was very easy to write on them. Plus out then; I was very keen on planning anything and everything. I used to think that writing about the goals was a sureshot way to achieve them. I was consuming lots of self-help books and was also a member of Toastmaster Club back then which is a sort of non-profit organisation for developing your leadership and communciation skills. Gradually reality dawned on me that discipline, will power and constant, sustained efforts are more important and planning is just the first stop towards acheiving your goals.

Gradualy I came out of that vicious circle. First I let go of my reliance on self-help motivational books. Regarding toastmasters; I finally it in 2014 after crawling to clear the first level of 10 speeches( I had joined it in 2012). I wrote last blog post on my Birthay in 2015 as I could not see any positive results regarding acheiving goals. In fact, I stopped writing about so called goals on occasion of New Year too.

22 December 2020

The date stamp should give an idea about my struggle with blogging. Seemls like my birthday and new year post will be combined into single post now. I'm going to go out on a limb and after eating the humble pie; I'm inclined again to make some sort to plan with goals and milestones to follow in coming year. The next year is special and unique in more than one ways. firstly, we are well within the age of COVID virus. Secondly I have more than enough spare time on my hand right now unlike my situation some months back. Right now my challange is more on putting the spare time to good use rather than finding any time out of busy schedule. One thing I'm very sure is that I need to change the very approach from last time and it will start from the goals itself. Even though my idea remains same of personal improvement but I dont want to rely on cliche goals of reading more books, more blogs, reducing weights etc. All of these are actually a process, not the milestones I wish to pursue. Some of the goals I have in mind are as below

Learning new Language - Spanish

I always treat polyglots with admiration. In our hyper-connected world, knowing more than one languages is one of most relevants skills to gain. Its all the more relevant in my case as my current organisation has its head quarter in Spain. Moreover Spanish is one of the most widely spoken language perhaps after english and hence it makes good sense to learn it. I also found useful source in terms of YouTube channel to learn Spanish. But now I need to follow it religiously. My target is to look for any official certification course in Spanish and pass it.

Upgrading the qualification and skills  - Robotics

I have been fascinated by Robotics and Simulation for quite some time now. It looks magical and appeals to my childhood sense of wonder. Fortunately both these streams are part of my job and hence I have been motivated to master these fields from a purely professional point of view too. In spur of moment at startingof year, I had enrolled into a Robotics course offered online by IIT. But it did not end well for me. From the vey beginning, I was late and not prepared for this course and was playing catch-up only for the most part. In the end, I did not appeared for the exam as there was no chance I could clear the exam and earn the certificate. The only positive gain from the exercise that I had made one small beginning into Acedemic Robotics. My target is to enrol into another course and this time, actually earn the degree.

The last thing is to ensure that I incarporate my effort toward achieving these goals in daily routine. Else this activity is limited to another blog post only. I have always been an early morning person but the unseasonal cold wave is testing my resolve to leave cosy blankets early in the day.

PS : I realized that my car is also around 6 years old now. It means that I started this blog at the same time I bought my car. Just an useless trivia but I found it interesting.

I'm adding this section of blog post from my phone in the morning. It's just some edits in terms of correcting grammatical errors plus I added few lines here and there  But nonetheless, it's a small step in right direction.

Hope I could continue this 

Jealousy

 Writing on this topic is like stirring hornet's nest. There is so much of negative emotion attached with this word; that looking for any positive connotation is  like looking for needle in a haystack. Probably jealousy is not the right term for the behavioral feeling I want to describe but its related with comparison with others, lack of self esteem, this nagging feeling that life is not fair to you and you are getting short end of the stick.

Human memory is a strange thing, you remember some unremarkable experiences unintentionally. I remember one mundane memory from one of my previous company. I remember there was a notepad with plain sheet on one side to write on and some random quotes on other side. One of the quote which was quite interesting and which I still remembers is as below. "Jealousy is powerful motivator. Use it to get better that the person you resent". It was not exactly the same words but close enough if my memory serves me right. At that time I have not paid much attention to it except noticing it for its oddity.

Another remarkable experience from that company is not so innocuous. It happened right after our company was acquired by another bigger company and the the resultant downsizing of the manpower. It goes without saying the environment was full of insecurity and stress. As if it was not worse enough. We had another crisis as somehow the salary details for every employee in the office was made public. If rumors are to be believed, it was the handiwork of accounts person who was asked to leave and who thought that it will be good fun to share these confidential details. The negative effect of these details on psyche of most of the employees cannot be overstated. Probably it just acted as a catalyst for an already explosive environment prevailing in our office. But there was a blast resulting in most of the people loosing their peace of mind.

As in every office, there are always groups and groups within groups. People forming friendships depending on their work profile, internal customers and their individual natures. But this incidents formed a new group of so called Haves and Have nots. People redefined their association and friendship based on how much salary you are drawing. I found myself into the Have not category based on my Salary drawn. Total experience wise, I was pretty senior but in this company I was part of new recruitment. And evidently the company has started cost cutting in Salaries off late. Or they have realized that they are actually paying above market average and now they were in course correction. Whatever the reason may be, it was clear that there was a marked change in the salary structure of the company. The employees who have managed to join the company in the earlier phase have managed much better remuneration that the latest joiners. So we were the martyrs who want to highlight the elephant in the room and have discussion on rationality of salary structure. However other people who have managed to get more salary package had this version that every-one got what they asked for at the time of employment and hence it makes no sense to raise this point now. Personally for me there was another complication as even though I was very experienced, My previous experience was in another field altogether plus education wise I was a diploma holder whereas there were many junior employees in my company who were more qualified academically than me (including some MBAs too)

In the hindsight and specifically after the gap of around 6-7 years now. Its difficult for me to understand why I behave in the way that I did. Perhaps I was disillusioned after a few years in the company with regards to my career trajectory. All that this group did was to add fuel in the fire. Whatever may the reason was, the end result was that I was frustrated and not able to think rationally after comparing my salary with few of my colleagues. This realization that I was the least paid out of my department and in-spite of my continuous good performance (at least in my perception). There was no way I could bridge this gap ever. I cant say if my actions were driven by my latent frustration or anger regarding  my career trajectory or it was an impulsive response on the salary structure. But I did took some actions like talking to my immediate superior on this topic. It was a difficult topic to broach specially as I did not enjoyed a very good rapport with my boss but I did it nonetheless. My boss's response was as expected. He just put his hands up and shrugged it off.  But he did agreed to my other demand regarding change in my current responsibilities. I managed to get more responsibilities than my current role which means better visibility in the eyes of management. I'm not going into more details else it will take more than one post to describe my colorful experiences in that company but my boss resigned after some time. Interestingly, he was very junior to most of the team but was degree holder from a prestigious college of our country and very high of self confidence. However his tenure was almost a failure and he was clearly disinterested in last few months in the company. After he left, the company wants to fill in the position internally. There were three person in contention including me for that internal promotion. It was like management has let a cat out in the wolves, We were already not great friends of each other but this environment of mutual competition destroyed any possibility of cordial relationship between us.

Around 7 years later and with tones of water under Yamuna and other rivers, Most of us are in different companies now but that incident triggered something which still leaves a bitter taste in everyone's mind. There is a tendency to constantly compare yourself with others and draw satisfaction in other's failures than your own success. Seems like even though everyone is charting a different course, their stories are inter-linked with each other. We are still interested in malicious gossip about each other. 

Personally I have moved on to another companies after that. Looking back, it was not an unique situation in that company only. In every companies we'll find management's favorites. I myself have been branded as boss's favorite on more than one occasion. But on my credit, I always tries to downplay it, plus the fact the my nature is more on agreeable side make it less hard on other people. On the other hand, I have seen people who loves to brag and exaggerate about themselves. Which tends to further aggrieve other people including myself. 

The only conclusion, I could draw is that its very difficult to to remove this tendency of comparison and jealousy from your mind. The only preventive measure you can take is that it should not consume you totally, and instead of dragging the other person down, It should motivate you to rise further.

 

Lockdown 2020

7 June 2020

 

It’s around 75 days of lock-down in India (Well... 74 to be exact). And 46 days into my new Job. Both the events were interlinked for me and had far reaching impact. My world has been turned 180 degrees though I'm sure majority of people can echo the same thoughts. I have seen enough memes, motivation messages and stories about utilizing your time in upgrading your qualification. However personally I have been found wanting to effectively utilize the extra time at my disposal.

Part of this procrastination can be attributed to the atmosphere of uncertainty due to Coronavirus. In my case the uncertainty as doubled as I was in between jobs. As I had put it, it was the wrong time for right decision. As someone who was very prone to self-doubts. The situation was doubly stress-full for me with everyone advising me against this decision. Even my standard reason that It was a calculated risk was losing its sheen even for me. Part of the reason that I still stuck with my decision was because my previous company was not interested in retaining me. 

 

23 July 2020

 

The very fact that I am writing the second parts of post after so many days and its relevant of the topic is a grim reminder enough that COVID 19 situation is still not over is India. Even though we are not in official lockdown now. But the cases are increasing gradually and steadily belying all the previous expectation by government and the public at large.

This uncertainty is going to stay with us for now. With prefect 6/6 hindsight. If I had known that I will have 125 days with ample time in my hand for total transformation. Perhaps things would have been different. All along for last 4 years. I had believed that my biggest problem is lack of time and the toxic environment in the office. 

Interestingly, I am not in a situation where both pain points are removed now.

I'm working from home due to Corona earlier and later new job.

In a new job hence no bitterness from previous job either.

Still everything is not hunky dory as it looked with rose tinted glasses in my dreams. The time seems to fly away, and I struggle to explain at the end of day about what I did the full day. There are some inherent challenges in work from home like no transition between informal atmosphere at home and official decorum. Plus, lack of support system of colleagues which keeps you focused (however difficult to believe it may be)

The question to be asked is that where these extra hours gone in that case. In my previous hours (my office commute itself was around 5-6 hours easily which is a huge saving). What I could gather from my schedule is as below

 

1) More sleep: I was guilty of compromising on my sleep-in order to keep up with my ungodly schedule in previous job. My total sleep hours were right in very unhealthy category. It was also showing in frequent bouts of fever that I used to have in that company. Hopefully, the damage was reversible and now I am back to having required 6 to 8 hours of sleep. If anything, I am well rested now. The only challenge that I face is regarding getting up early as that is the only time when I can exercise in peace or rather do anything in peace before other family members wake up

 

2) Exercise / daily stop target: The second change considering my new schedule is regarding physical activity. Previously I do not have any time to exercise and my job mainly comprises of sitting on chair in front of laptop or sitting in car driving to and from office. It created all sorts of issues related to back pain. As I am approaching wrong side of 40 now. I tried by best to incorporate some exercise in my daily routine, but it was a challenge due to real paucity of time. Now that I have ample time at my disposal. I am realizing that it is not easy to implement healthy lifestyle even if you have time to do so. Willpower and discipline are as important as availability of time. Slowly and gradually If moving towards active lifestyle from a totally sedentary one. Counting my steps is an easy alternative to achieve the means. Courtesy the health app on my phone. I can keep track of how many steps I walk in a way. In my previous company I even struggle to achieve 1500 steps on a bad day, and I target was hovering around 6000 steps. As walking is easy compared to hardcore exercise. I manage to keep us at this target. My average is hovering around 8k to 10k and on good days I could achieve 15-16k too.

However only walking in not enough of physical activity and I'm really struggling to add any other more hardcore physical activities in my daily schedule. Initially I had plans to join gym which is ruled out now due to COVID 19 problems. For now, I'm following the Nike Training Club app again which offers workout plan of various durations for strengthening, flexibility etc. I understand even this is not enough but at least I have the solace of taking small-small steps towards the goal.

 

2 August 2020

3) Book reading: It’s a good marker about my metal condition. I have been a bibliophile for quite some time now. Although a bit shallow in my reading hobbies now. But nonetheless I still love to devour books which is constant for many years barring a break in between which was quite recent. Just before I left my last company, there was an internal of many months where I was not feeling like reading any books whatsoever. Infact, in a rarity, I missed my reading target last year which has not happened for many years. Perhaps it was a sign about my state of mind in that period. Even after lockdown and some days into my new job. I have not started book reading immediately. Gradually I rekindled my love of kindle. Now I am back in groove as far as reading books is concerned. The only point is regarding moving from quantity to quality which is easier said than done. I can finish my stable of books (thrillers, myth fiction) over a night's read but struggle when it comes to heavier reads as I struggle to concentrate for longer duration.

 

7 August 2020

4) Binge watching: Occasionally I love to let my hair down and binge on whatever the OTT platform has to offer. But the two pre-requisites for the same, Peace of mind and some spare time at my disposal; are the two things which remains elusive for me. However due to lock-down and working from home, I had ample time on my hands-on weekends, and I can afford to immerse in binge watching. Peace of mind remains a Chimera, nonetheless. In a small measure, there was also this idea to utilize the complete data package available to me as part of my WI-FI plan. I have finished a few web-series. However, there is a limit on how many series are available free or on my subscription as I do not want to spend money on subscribing every OTT provider specially when there is so much data available for free.

 

PS: At conclusion of this post, Its 135 days from the lockdown. The situation has only got worse regarding no of cases. India’s covid-curve seems like an ideal growth curve as ironically it is showing steading growth with no signs of tapering-off in sight.

The situation is bleak looking right now. I try to imagine the scenario in future when Corona will be over and thinking that how will we judge this period. Whether It bring out the best in us or the worst in guess. I guess, only time will tell.

2020

Dated - April 23, 2020

Considering my last post was on 24 November 2019. Lots of water has passed below Ganges, Yamuna and all the rivers worldwide in these five months. Looking back with perfect hindsight of 6/6, there was no inkling whatsover when I penned down my last post, (figuratively) that it will be total chaos in the future.
So much has happended that sometimes I have to pinch myself to ensure that this is all real. Not even in my wild dreams or should I say nightmares I had thought that story of streotypical doomsday movie will be played out in real life. But Corona Virus is a nightmarish reality that has affected whole world right now.
The other thing which is also totaly surreal is that I have managed to switch job afterall. This developement took a few years in making and on more than one occation I came very close to switch last year. But somehow there are always some obstacles.
Life is moving so fast that its difficult to catch up. But now the tables are turned. My eternal grieveances regarding lack to time to do anything and the frusturation which was building up is finished now. Apart from a minor setback of restricted inside homes due to Lockdown in effect, rest everything is perfect. Now its not a question of lack of time or energy anymore. Now the real challenge begins which will test the focus and willpower more than ever.

Corona Virus : 
Enough has been already said  about Corona Virus with no end in sight in near future. This is so unprecedented that we dont even know how to react. Probably its too soon to form an impression but what could have been a rejuvating sabbatical has turned into anxiety filled wait full of uncertainities. Its almost like a sword is hanging over eveyone head.
I have had a double whammy as this uncertainity is coupled with job related uncertainity too as I'm between jobs. Considering how prone I'm for additional and sometimes non required stress. I have been handling myself remarkably well. I've been trying and to a certain extent succedding in keeping myself busy in some productive works which is the key to beating this stress really. In view of limitations in place on physical movement due to lockdown imposed, I'm still trying to keep myself as busy as possible.
I'm ensuring that I dont waste extra time available in sleeping or binge watching on internet. Though sometimes I indulge myself in both the activities. But side by side I also had this  realization that shortage of time is not the only reason which was stopping me from achieving my targets. I have been far too lethargic with my progress now that I have ample of time. Its a wakeup call for me that I need to pull back myself. My only excuse if the stress due to uncertainity but ultimately keeping myself busy is the only solution to beat this uncertainity.
To put things into perspective, it took me aound 20-25 days of lockdown to commense reading books which has been one of my really consistent hobby and around 30 days to start writing. I have really stopped these activites since last six months due to stress and hectic schedule in my last job.
As I said earlier, The COVID 19 is very much far from over at this stage and we are still in the middle of this experience. Once this is over, then only I can conclude over the effect of this situation in totality.

Job :
I have been obsessesd about my job. Majority of my blog post for last few years are centred on my progress or lack of it in finding new job. Gradually I have been coming out of vicious circle. Also I'm mentally preparing myself to take the ultimate plunge of entrepreneurship.
With that ulitmate aim in my mind. The problem becomes bearable in last job also. And then thankfully I was successfull in coming out of that toxic environment. I'm a firm believer that such opportunites offer a clean slate to all of us. Its a second chance to put right the wrong persception formed about you in your last inning. My experince in my last job shows that its very difficult to fight a negative perception about you. Having passion is certain prerequisive for successfull job and in last few years I'm consistantly excited about Robotics and simulation. For a self taught person like me, The road ahead still looks tough and its very difficutl to find a good learning resource coupled with limiation of having a good laptop. But I'm tyring to make slow and steady progress. Hopefully the problem of my sytem (laptop) will be gone in next few days.

PS : updated on 14th May. The problem regarding laptop is solved now and I have more than enough in terms of laptop

Bucket list :
I was a big supported of having a bucket list. I believe that having well defined goals is the first step towards meaningfull and successfull life. However from past few years; I was not able to made much headway inspite of trying my best. At one point of time, it looks like that I'm using this so called bucket list like a crutch. A consolation price which gives me solace of moving even though I remain as far from my target as ever. Interestinglly one of the major target (participating in Airtel Half Marathon) was acoomplished last year  when I had not made any bucket list whatsoever. Also my ever present target of job change was also accomplished this year without any bucket list. I know it defies any kind of logic and the conventional wisdom says  that  how can you acheive something without aiming for it first but it happens in my case. Probably all the efforts made by me in the yesteryears do played a role.
Howevever I'm not going to make the Bucket list again this year but its important to keep the long terms aims in mind even if subconsciously so.

Will Power / Focus :
In my last job which I was doing as recently as few months ago, I was a very firm believer that only having more free time at my disposal will not magically solve all the problems. The key is how to utilize that time judiciously. Its absolutely imperative to maintain a focus on what all you want to acheive. Perhaps the previously discussed topic of goals will come in handy here.As the clear concise goals will help is keeping the mind focussed. Rather than lofty goals, the immediate short terms targets on daily basis are much more usefull in this regards.
The seocnd main goal that is equally important is to identify the biggest culprit that hinders these goals. The feeling of guilt is a very good indicator for these habits. Hence relying to this feeling of shame and guilty, I can safety conclude that I have problem with watching content on You-tube that I should not watch at all. We are living in age where entertaining content is alway available for all to consume. Combined with ever falling datapack price and we got one lethal and viciious combo that is very difficult to resit. And resist I must if I have any chance of making it successfull.
Gradually I'm coming to terms with this new routine of working from home and to adjust my working hours with spain as my company head office is in Spain. Side by side there is constant endeavour noot to losse sight of my ultiamate objective and strive on moving towards the same, One small step at a time.