Wrapping up 2025

 27 Dec 2025 : The date when I started this post. It’s (relatively) early morning, the house is dark and quiet. The family is sleeping as it is Saturday. The kind of setting which offers you peace of mind. The setting that I like for blogging.

Peace of mind. You can call it by different names like mindfulness but it’s the mental state that I crave. But first a disclaimer. I have no intention of listing out the events unfolded during the year in this post. One year is a long duration and I'm far too lazy for this initiative. I'm keener to lay out my current frame of mind as 2025 is drawing to end.

I have managed to resist the temptation of making long and elaborate list of goals and objectives for new year (so far!). Next in line was the usual dilemma for me this time of the year. The dilemma regarding how to spend (or effectively utilize) the few remaining days of this year. On one hand there is temptation to indulge in so called non-productive but rewarding activities of binge-watching OTT content, eat out to your heart's content and you can get rest of the gist. Basically, enjoying our life to the fullest leaving the boring grind to new Year. As alluring as it sounds, I somehow end up choosing the other option, which is to utilize this time as a launch pad to build momentum for next year. Once that decision is made, I have to deal with another one of my long-time enemies, try to do too many things and in the end do nothing. All the usual signs like embarking on a new habit or initiative, but the minds start drifting off on first sign of something which looks hard or monotonous. And then you start chasing the next goals, Goal which looks fantastic till the time you realize it also involves hard and monotonous steps only. Which brings me down to the current topic of my fascination (after taking a long and winding detour). MINDFULNESS.

To say that I have struggled with Mindfulness or in simple words "living in the moment" will be an understatement. As highly neurotic personality, I take too much stress imagining worst case scenario some of them never materializing. On the flip side as well, I have tendency to indulge in daydreaming as an escape route. Because of this I come across as a very serious, upright person whose face always shows lots of stress. Too an extent that I have never really enjoyed occasions like family functions, socializing with friends or vacations. Because to enjoy these events, you have to be fully present in those moments; both physically and mentally. 

In fact, I have realized that having too many goals is not the problem and it’s different from multi-tasking. Problem is that I start planning my next task without completing the one in hand.

So, as I wrap up this year (Actually the year is drawing to its end on its own due to cosmic events). The mental state that I want to be in is the state of Mindfulness. As has happened in last few years. The plans will fail next year as well. Life will keep throwing curveballs. And most of the time my time will not be in my control. But whatever small pockets of time I find and control and next year. If I could achieve mindfulness in those instances. I'm sure next year will be more rewarding than this one.

 

A post on "no posts"

 Ah the irony! A post on not posting enough (lately)

I feel so clever just on the idea of this post. Its like the neurons in brain has started firing again after a sort of hibernation of two years. 

the funny thing is ever since I started started this particular post (on 21st Oct to be exact). I have managed to write and publish two posts utilizing the looong weekend (actually it was almost complete week off due to Diwali). And I have beaten the grand record of last year (when I has published only one post). I have demonstrated my resilience to continue my legacy (of posting which nobody reads) from 2012.

So even though this post serves no purpose now (like most of things that I do or maybe like the life itself). Why not continue riding the momentum and see where this post leads up to. Whether it will eventually materialize into a published post or it will languish in heap of my drafts which could never see the metaphorical internet sun.

The issue is unlike my standards posts (where I languish in self pity), I intend for this post to be clever and witty, traits which gel with my personality like chalk and cheese. One of the idea that I was contemplating quite seriously was using prompt "write a funny and witty post on procrastination" and essentially use that as reference material. But to my credit, I have managed to resist the temptation of doing it so far. So the post upto here is as original or unoriginal as my thought process. And the poor LLM models has no role to play in the same. 

As the post matter is increasingly resembling the speech of current POTUS. I should focus and look at the topic of the post to remind myself the original topic, which is "NO POST".

So why these blogs post has hit a road block from last two year ?

Why I seems to have time for every trivial thing that I could think of but not blogging ?

My blog or speech style is always more on colloquial side. The flow state as its called sometimes, whenever I do manage is to get into that state, the conversion flows easily. And generally I feel good about myself. In some aspects its like meditation as I'm in present "in the moment" at that point of time. Off late that state is missing. Too many distractions and that familiar sinking feeling to trying to do too many things and in the end achieving nothing. The timing (its 21st December today) doesn't help as well as New year resolutions generally means long list of aspirational goals.

So why no posts!. As either I was contemplating too many things, getting frustrated with my jobs. Or whenever small pockets on relative calm I could find, I was devoting on other aspects like fitness or working on technical skills (Not to say the progress on both these aspects has been very dismal as well).

so resisting the temptation of making a long list (which includes the goals of more blog posts next year as well). But working on controlling my mental distractions. Lets see how I fare till New Year !